I'M BACK!

It's been two months since I've posted anything..... had a great time in Sydney with a few exceptions.... there were several days that the weather was unmanageable...one was 41 degrees with very high humidity.... it was a totally ugh day for everyone...we went to the beach and it was cooler there but very crowded and we had to be very careful as the sun was so hot... you can get 3rd degree burns there very easily....

Other than that, I spent once a week with Bruce, Osteopath.... he totally helped as the last 2 weeks of my time there I was able to walk without the cane.... bliss!
He was very happy when he heard that my surgery was scheduled for December as his treatments had readied the tissues.... much healthier and would recover much more quickly.... so he says!

Yes, my surgery is December 16th.... so lucky.... no one else wanted to be incapacitated for Xmas and, of course, I could care less this year.... so onward and upward.... I'm excited, nervous and scared.....

So I'm running around getting the house, the dogs and myself prepped for after surgery.... lots of errands, grocery shopping and cooking!

ONE MORE DAY!

And then I'm on my very long journey to Australia... read my ticket today and the flight from San Francisco to Sydney is 14 hours 30 minutes.... oh, my God! I'll have to take sleeping pills for sure!
\

Last two days have gone way too fast.... had pedicure, massage and an acupunture treatment..... and packed and repacked and am repacking again... the one suitcase was way too heavy and I jusst couldn't do it.... I tried one smaller one but nothing fit so now I'm onto two midsized cases and it's fine...

So next time I sign in will be when I'm in Australia.... wish me the very best journey ever!

BEAUTIFUL DAY....

Can't believe it's still so warm.... leaves flying all over the place though... definitely the Fall!

Have finished all my shopping required prior to leaving for Australia... now to cook the dogs' food and repack the old suitcase and I'm pretty much done... better be... only 3 more sleeps!

Still feeling a tad apprehensive about the flight and 2 months away but I'm sure once I'm there I'll be okay....will just miss my own home and bed!

Going to retirement banquet tonight... for all city employees retired this year.... taking Marianne so feel okay about going... just don't want any aggravation! Wouldn't go but that feels like I'd be giving my power away... staying away because of some elusive THEM! They just can't matter that much! And I'm receiving a lovely gold/silver bracelet so that's nice.

SUNDAY

Thought I would do tons today but I'm not.... did put deck furniture and candles and pillows and blankets away... but not much else.... maybe this evening....

Talked with the kids on Skype.... funny to see everyone in the regular day to day setting....

Had such a nice time in Waterton that I feel lazy today.... and most of the stuff on my list can't be done until closer to my departure date...


Marianne came over for coffee and we had a good visit.... she certainly isn't supporting Darcie no matter what.... recognizes her limitations but also that Darcie is the boss and that's just the way it is....Marianne is willing to go to the retirement event with me so I shall phone the City and make sure okay to bring a guest.....

FRIDAY NIGHT!

WOW! only 7 more sleeps and I start the horrendous trek to Australia! My fingers are crossed that I make all my connections and I'm upgraded and have the best trip ever!

Heard that the grad for my last training class was last week... and Darice didn't let me know after all her stuff around me coming! I was pissed off for awhile but okay now.... Darcie apparently believes I don't want anything to do with them and maybe she's right.... I'm okay with not doing anything about that!

Spent half the day with Deb.,.. she brought over the poster for Lucas's 13th birthday.... not what I wanted but I still love it! It's very very good and I can make up as many as I wish if everyone loves it....we also went to Broxburn for strawberries and to Chapters for books... I finally bought the calendars for my AUS family.... so think I'm done except for cooking the dogs food... and that is up for the first part of the week.....

Going to Waterton tomorrow with Jan.... after meeting with the Pet City girls who will be looking after the dogs over the Thanksgiving weekend.....

Tired... going to bed early!

HOT HOT HOT

Summer is back again if only for another week! Time to clean up the yard and put away furniture, outside stuff.... by the time I return there'll be snow and too late to do!

Had lunch with Nicole Kozak today... she retired as of last week ... she looks great already... think she was more ready than I... but who knows what it will bring her.. just nice to see her happy and positive!\ She's going to retirement function so think I'll go too!

Bought a pair of Clark's runners today to take to Australia... very comfy and look casual but I could wear as dressy.... runners today are sooo different!

Got my US$$ yesterday and saw the Doc so have all my meds for the two months... the pain pills are horrendously expensive and not covered under my medical! But I shall send in for reimbursement and see what happens! Probably won't use them much anyways as I seem to tolerate the discomfort fairly well.....

Still not sure what to wear on plane... want to wear my black/white coat/jacket so restricted.... but have lots of "black" choices! Just really want to be comfy!

SUNDAY SUNDAY

What better day of the week to be raining! Effe, Tess and I stayed in bed until noon watching old movies and drinking coffee! Haven't done that in forever!

It's time to get serious about the final things to do before Australia.... purchasing and cooking the dogs' meals....final choices of clothing to take...cleaning up the yard and putting yard stuff away for next year!

Supposed to be hot hot next week so will leave out a few things so we can still sit on deck.....

Everything seems quiet when it's raining out... a lovely cozy feeling!

HOW MUCH BETTER CAN IT GET!

Feeling good.... had a massage and my body feels normal again.... so much better.... didn't have lunch with Deb today .... they got caught up in buying new car...

So,I spent money on a new laptop.... found a 14 inch for $550 ... at Visions... it has everything I wanted and it feels much smaller so will be easy to take to Australia... happy I did it as now I know I'll be able to use and play and create and not disturb David....

Very tired today as I pretty much was awake from one to 6:30 .... yawn!

The $$ thing.... I realized today that I was treating my little extra pot as something I couldn't touch when in fact I saved this bit top handle my "settling into retirement" fund... so I need to let go just a tad and do just that... the computer, the new door and the trip are all coming out of that pot and then life will settle down.... it's my safety fund!

FABULOUS

Just had the last of my guest for Cheryl's "dessert evening" leave.... think everyone enjoyed themselves.... especially seeing Cheryl's slideshow....

Marianne stayed later and she got around to talking about "work".... of course! God, I cannot believe how I get pissed off at what she tells me... mostly because
what is happening is seen as something I haven't done... which is so not true..so I took the time to dig out the emails and letters and files that I gave to Darcie...
and I refused to give it to Marianne.... suggested she suggest to Darcie that she call me.... if Darcie would rather bitch than learn, so be it... I will not take that on! Her responsibility... not mine anymore.... and to think of all the time I was there for her and she just couldn't sit still long enough to hear or learn or take notes.... and now she puts it out like I didn't leave anything or tell her anything! What I would like to say to that!!

Okay, calm down.... breathe.... back into the moment... you cannot change what Darcie does or says.... you can only control how you respond/react! And on that note I'm going to bed......

Monday, Monday....

and isn't it lovely! Today was a great day and I am grateful for every second of it... I think I started to get the hang of "retirement" today... a little step forward anyways....

didn't do much and did it in my own time and in my own way... you know, the wash, the loading and unloading of dishwasher, making dinner for the dogs... having a nap, etc. etc.

it makes me tired just reading this..... yeah!

Wonderful weather....

It's Saturday... how do I know?! Alicia isn't in school! It's actually cool how it doesn't matter any more... what day and pretty much what time.... only if I have an appointment or!

Went through closet again and all of letters and cards I had set aside to take to Lee.... cut them in half... just won't have the room.... I do believe I know have my travel outfit handled... why is that important... well travelling for 30+ hours is a bit of a nightmare and anything can happen so wearing something that is "cool" and then if it gets too cool, ability to layer.... and also it has to be comfie... able to sleep in it! So, will take a clean t-shirt in my backpack as I am renowned for spilling and a pair of yoga pants for the 13 hour flight from San Fran to Sydney...should have room in there for those... if not I'll delete the pants!

Took Alicia out of her birthday lunch ... we went to Georgio's and it was excellent... she's fun to hang out with... a very mature 22 year old! We went to the new Shoppers Drug Mart on the westside... wow! Bought a book for the plane so that's done too!

Have done well in figuring out how to upload photos to Facebook... Lee was proud of me!

This week it's the "dessert night"... will make pavlova, ribbon cake and possible coconut cupcakes...hopefully they eat it all!

TIRED....

Not sure why but I feel so tired today.... weather change is likely the culprit!

Finally got to Gayle's today with all my jeans for alteration.... have gone down a size and even though I don't mind loose, I really hate it when they bag all over...so Gayle is taking them in here and there..... and a very lightweight dress for me to take to Australia.... haven't worn it for ages but it'll be good for this trip....

Went to library too so I have books to read until I leave.... if I didn't do that, I'd end up reading the books I've bought to take with me....

Going to bed soon!

And more and more....

Feeling discombobulated (?) today.... slept well so not sure what this is about other than I do get myself tied up in knots about packing for Australia... never seem to have all the "right" things with me and don't have the $$ to shop the way I usually do ..... and two months is the longest I've been for years so need more clothes than usual.... taking jeans/capris and t-shirts is the plan as well as a warm scarf, cardigan and maybe even a light coat for travelling.... sweats for around the house and beach.... and a pair of dressy slax and top for the theatre and any other "dressier" occasion. We don't do that very much so one outfit more than enough.... it's the changing of seasons that makes this difficult!

Or maybe I'm just making it hard cause I need to fuss about something!

Enjoyed working yesterday with Penny.... and fun to go to Calgary... bought the Nintendo DS games the kids want so another 'task' to tick off the list!

Penny hinted very heavily that there will be work for me next year if I want it... and I am sure I do.... feels like a good fit.... get to use what I know and do it as a "project"....and mostly from home! Couldn't get much better!

Must get the shopping done so I actually have food to cook for Griff and Cheryl!

23 MORE SLEEPS!

Yes, that's all! So lots to do so need to get my ass in gear!

Just back from Calgary .... saw Dallas and met her Liam.... gorgeous baby! Stayed
at Delta Bow Valley ... paid by Provincial Victim Assistance Association... worked
with the President for l/2 day today developing a new funding application to
hopefully get more $$ to do the work needed.... it was fun to use my brain again!

Shopped at Shoe Company and bought a great pair of Naturalizers for 2/3 the price of the store in Lethbridge.... also found another pair of jeans and a dressier white t-short.... so that's my travelling outfit.... comfy enough to withstand 30+ hours of travel!

Cheryl and Griff coming to dinner tomorrow so out to buy groceries....and take my
stuff to Gayle for alterations.... or she won't be able to do them in time for the
trip....

Wow, Cool Day!

Supposed to hot today but stayed about 22 degrees with a light wind.... loved it! Massage this morning, the dogs to grooming and picked up my "recovered" photos from London Drugs..... so good to have them even though it cost a bit...

Massage got my poor body stirred up so taking Tylenol steadily and resting... reading a good book so not so bad!

Labour Day Weekend.... how did it get to this so quickly!

Picked up jeans for David today... so that's one more task ticked off for Australian trip...

Rest of weekend will be quiet... will put finishing touches on closet, clean off deck, etc.... also need to find some paperwork for writing funding apps... going to Calgary Monday afternoon to do some work with the provincial victim assistance association.... also to see Dallas I hope....

SEPTEMBER?!

Well, what a great week! Have spent time with Cheryl and with Deb .... two of the best women on the planet! Loved seeing and being with them again!

Also, took my camera into London Drugs and they are pretty sure they can recover my photos.... will know by the weekend.... soooo happy about that!

Had a pedicure today and did some groceries....too hot to do anything else!

ETC.

Monday Monday.... did a bit more in my closet... have a bag of donations now and an "almost" amazing closet! Just need to find a bit more space for my duvet, etc. and then sort through my "work" clothes and delegate them to the basement for the time being!

Ruth and Pete stopped in for coffee.... woke me up as I had not fallen asleep until 5:30 a.m. That was unbelieveable... haven't done that in years... my head just kept going round and round about absolutely nothing.... finally took a couple of Tylenol as my hip was acting up as well.... so when they knocked on the door at 9:30 I was still snoring.....

Watered the yard and pulled some dead flowers and generally assessed what I need to do to put it all away for the winter BEFORE I leave for Australia....

Made appointments for groomer and for vet for the babes....

Fay sent me a copy of the show on the house.... it was great! She made the house look fabulous and me not so bad.... so need to send it off to Lee etc.....

Having lunch with Cheryl tomorrow.... can't wait to see her...

SUNDAY SUNDAY!

Have been working on the closet from hell all weekend! Made extremely good progress! As I'm doing, I'm packing for Australia! Makes it so much easier and I know what I still have to do. Not that I have that many seasons to cover this time.. two months but mostly late spring/early summer... so what I'm wearing now.

Hip been bothering me all weekend so kind of slowed me down. Have stayed home and when I do that I find I settle down and I don't worry so much about what I'm not doing. It's all about staying in the moment. Watched golf... Tiger didn't win but came from behind to "almost"... that's when I love watching him the most!

Making a good dinner for tonight... barbequed chicken and potatoes with onions and garlic in foil cooked on the barbie! Yum!

Cheryl must be here now... don't expect to hear from her until tomorrow... having lunch Tuesday after my acupuncture appointment!

AND THE BEAT GOES ON.....

Thursday.... Tammy coming to clean so I left.... went to Winner's to buy the largest suitcase I could find as I am limiting myself to one suitcase no matter what! Hope it works.....

Had coffee with Sharon which was lovely to catch up.... did groceries and came home.... afternoon coffee with Pat (Joanne's mom).... that was super nice too... cannot believe she's 78.... so nice to know someone older than I who has been retired for awhile.... she was very supportive... not by saying things get better but by saying, yes, you do have to create your own life.... and all the issues I'm facing are normal!

Tomorrow I start the "closet from hell".... boxes and bags for donations and my HUGE suitcase for Australia.... I'm ready to go!

DONE!

Shoot completed and it went well.... pretty day with good light..... will be on CTV at 5:00 August 31st....

Now on to the closet.... going out to buy a LARGE suitcase first... so I can dump all the stuff I'm taking to Australia into it as I tear the closet apart! Consignment/Donations here I come!

Bought travel health insurance yesterday! Yikes to the treble.... $539 ... ageing penalty! For 66 days! Marianne told me that I can put this on my income tax so that will help because there's no choosing about the insurance....heard too many
horror stories about people losing their savings because they became ill overseas!

Cheryl in Lethbridge tomorrow.... so looking forward to seeing her!

38 MORE SLEEPS!

Yes, that's all.... then it's Australia for 57 days.... so much to do before then! I think my procrastinating is to create the feeling I actually have a ton to do and I'd better get busy!

The shoot for the CTV piece is Wednesday... can't wait for it to be over as it's painful to keep everything neat and tidy and to always be noticing a dirt speck! Not my style!

Tomorrow to the hospital for another pre-op appointment... then groceries and then do all the finishing touches for the shoot.

Going to Calgary on the 31st to do some work with Penny creating funding applications for the Association..... should be fun....

Bought Lee her usual pj's and a bracelet for her just past birthday!

Feeling good.... Alicia home so more sounds in the house and I like that! She has decided to stay another year and I am very grateful for that... this isn't the year I wanted a new tenant but now that money counts in my budgeting... a lot!

ETC., ETC.

It's Saturday.... yesterday Fran from CTV dropped by to look at the house... she wants to show it on the Sticks and Stones segment of the CTV 5:00 News.... she produces.... so today I am trying to put it all back together.... I have way too much paper around... books, mags, things to do lists, emigration stuff, Australia stuff... and where to put it!? That's the question... think I need to buy a desk with a hutch and drawers.. might help! But the show will only show the great room (kitchen/living room), the bathroom (of course) and my bedroom! So can use office to dump everything until they finish shoot next Wednesday.

Feeling a bit panicky about Australia in terms of the dogs... Alicia not back until Tuesday... but I do know Nola can be backup... it's more their food... do I cook all of it now... or half of it and expect Alicia to cook when she is in her last semester and will probably be stressed enough... we'll see..... I am sure they won't starve.

Colin, my carpenter, is coming back to do the back door.... looked at new door handles and the one I love is basically $200... who knew! So need to think about that! He's going to fix the ensuite floor as well.

So, better get back to the cleaning up....

HOME AGAIN

And not sure I'm happy about it! Feeling very disconcerted.... not missing my job... but understanding that each day will only be what I create! And not sure
I'm up for it right now.... and yet, I must be or I shall get totally depressed!

Had a very nice time with my family at the reunion.... found it interesting that
few asked me about Dad.... or spoke of his suicide.... maybe not so strange.. it
had been 10 years since his funeral and that was the last time I had seen most of
them!

I truly feel sucky and alone today.... hope I get over it soon!

HERE I GO AGAIN!

Back on the road tomorrow heading for the Stuart reunion! Staying in Golden as the total drive is way over what I can do..... booked the hotel so don't need to worry about a place to stay!

Bought a bathing suit if you can believe..... the most hated task of all.... trying on bathing suits.... BUT.... I went to Travelman and it was just way too easy... saw one right off that I liked and they had one that fit! Can you believe that! Just took the VISA out and paid without kavetching about the price (you don't want to know!). Should do me for the rest of my life....

All ready to go without a great deal of fuss which is cool.... so.... talk to you at th end of this week!

SOLUTION REACHED!

Thank god for friends! Thought I was going to have to cancel the trip to the Stuart Reunion as my dog/housesitter cancelled..... but Marianne stepped in and is staying Friday and Saturday nights and I am coming home one day early which is no big deal! I'll stay for the Saturday evening barbeque and then travel to Golden which is only three hours..... easy drive even after all that food!

Today is a lovely weather day... sun's out and it's only 25.... perfecto! Cleaned my deck but it needs the blasting thingamagig..... the dirt looks ground in after all that rain! But at least it looks inviting enough to sit on again....

Jan and Maynard just stopped by... it's Jan's 46th birthday! Maynard very stressed about his upcoming surgery.... hard for him to be present but he knows it.... I totally get it as even with my surgery which isn't for another 8-10 months, I have
fears.... pretty normal, I think....

Looking forward to the reunion and the drive now.... much cooler everywhere so I should be good in terms of breathing! Going to do my wash and set aside stuff for packing.... going to keep that low key though as it's minimum days.... just need comfy stuff especially for the driving part! Booked Ramada in Golden for the first night.... have discovered Seniors' Rate....whoopee!

ANOTHER DAY COST MORE THAN ANOTHER DOLLAR!

Weather still overcast and I love every second of it! Experience in Vancouver still way too fresh.

Took dogs to groomer and now they look beautiful! Tess appears to be doing better but not counting on it! I could swear she's menopausal and driving not only me but herself crazy.

Found the dry dogfood that they "appear" to like at Just for Pets so that's good... maybe I can quit cooking so much for them.

Starting to pack a bit for family reunion next weekend... leaving Wednesday.... borrowed a plug in cooler so I can have food available at reunion. Just about every relative has a motorhome or pull trailer.... my other two cousins and I are staying at hotel so we have work out our food sources differently than everyone else!

STILL ON VACATION - IN MY MIND!

Third day of my return home and still haven't unpacked! Is that good or bad? Think I am really still on "vacation" - different than "retired"!

To be honest I am feeling discombobulated - however, I totally get it that I am supposed to be doing/feeling exactly what I am feeling/doing (not doing?). Think I would be fooling myself if I thought I could walk away from a job I love without any sadness. That is not the issue for me.... it's staying present with today and not running off "getting busy"....

Now that I've been home for a few days and look back at Vancouver - never mind the horrendous weather I experienced (apparently those were the hottest days EVER recorded in Vancouver) - I see it as it is today and know there isn't any going back - that's as far as I've managed to travel (in my mind!)....

Starting to ready for the family reunion in the Shuswap next week.... hopefully all the fires will be under control and the air quality will not deteriorate any further!

After that it's Cheryl and Griff's homecoming plus a few other events... and then it's time to pack for Australia....

Wicked thunderstorms tonight... we are to have a week of them with temps in the mid to high teens.... I am not complaining! Feels good to be this cool! Hopefully the lightening doesn't do damage or injure anyone!

HOME!

Yes, I'm back and back much earlier than planned! The heat and the B.C. fires sent me running home! No one was moving and no one wanted to move.... and Linda's apartment was worse than a hot box!

So, I did stay with Dot,Dorothy, Benji and had coffee with Doreen! Wonderful to see all those folks even if it was uncomfortable weather (to say the least!).

Overwhelmed by the growth in B.C. and the prices! Won't be living in the Lower Mainland as it takes a lot of money to do so... the only place worth looking at was the Hope area and not sure about that! The other areas were between Creston and Cranbrook... beautiful valley sites and stunning views!

Maybe this trip was about "wanting what I already have"!

VANCOUVER HERE I COME!

Leaving tomorrow.... have dog stuff all done so Alicia won't have any problems and looking after them will be easy!

So much to do to get ready.... thank God for Alicia....

Only so much to do cause away for almost 4 weeks and in such different settings... had to take stuff for cold and hot! And, of course, all the crap that goes with it!

Am doing well in all things... mailed off the letter to Insp. Catonio yesterday but I am not expecting a response... which is okay... maybe better than okay! Have some work in Calgary when I get back and that's enough for now!

Excited.... won't be taking my laptop so no Facebook nor blogging for awhile... and that's okay too... need a real break from the norm!

TESS'S DAY....

She's doing better today.... what do I mean by that? She doesn't run away every time I head in her direction... does that mean she's forgotten me trying to ram meds down her throat? Maybe.... she's just one weird dog! She's still sleeping downstairs but is upstairs more and more during the day....

Had acupunture treatment today.... wow! Very intense! Haven't felt a treatment in exactly that way before. Lots of stuff to release after working 21 years in crisis!
And, then, of course, there's all the "stuff" about retiring! But we won't go there tonight - I'm too tired to care!

Bought a lot of second hand books today.... hopefully will discover some new authors... can't wait on my favourites' next book any longer.... don't have enough of them!

Only 5 more days and I'm off on my "road trip"! So looking forward to it... especially now that I know Tess will be okay until I return... then we'll see...

Off to bed.... to read!

STORMY DAY!

Start of another week... and what a day.... thunder so loud the dogs and I scrambled to get under the quilt!

Pat came over to read my letter to the LRPS re training - then we went for lunch at the Country Club where Pat plays golf.... lovely lovely food!

Starting to get serious about packing for Vancouver trip as I'm gone for 26 days - cooking food for the dogs so it's easy for Alicia to feed them..... paying the bills etc....

Feeling more clear that my challenge is to stay in today... not get sidetracked by emotions or events.... I believe that's how I'll get to the "next" step... day by day....

TODAY....

Beautiful weather again.... could get used to this! Leaving on the 19th for Vancouver... still worried about Tess but decided to put her back on her regular
food and forget it until I return from Vancouver and then I shall go at it again.
I understand that she is controlling the situation but am unclear about how to deal with it. I know I could take her and force her - probably painfully for her - but that makes me cringe... even knowing it will help her.... she won't come near me now...hides in the basement all the time and if I go near her she backs off...for a dog that was attached to my hip and was such a suck, this is very very difficult.. probably more for me than her although I'm not sure about that either... all in all it sucks!

Bought a backpack finally... it's got tons of pockets and seems light and roomy... shall break it in on my Vancouver trip.... so much easier when I am using the cane all the time now....

Later....

DAYS LATER.....

Had to stop trying to write everyday... was giving me the heebejeebies! Interesting weather this year... last year it was so hot at this time one could hardly breathe..and it stayed that way right into August...

Had a bit of a shock yesterday... found out some things that have been happening at the Service that blew my socks off.... so I have decided I can no longer..with any integrity... go back and do contract work for them.....am working on a letter to my ex-boss advising.... want to be explicit as I refuse to be held responsible for the demise of anything....! All that has occurred has done so because of the decisions they are making.... time to take responsibility, guys!

Anyways, other than that I am trying to find something that Tess will eat that is actually good for her and will stop the kidney stuff.... spent $50 at Tail Blazers - a natural dogfood store.... so will try all the things I bought... one down already... doesn't give me much hope for the other stuff.... feel very powerless about getting her to eat properly so she feels better!

Getting excited about going to Vancouver though... 9 more days and I'm off.... and won't be back until August 15th at the earliest!

Payout on vacation owed, etc., was better than anticipated so think that will definitely pay for Vancouver and probably most of Australia expenses (except fare, of course).....

Later.....

Have had several lazy days.... taken dogs to groomer and Tess to the vet... she hasn't been well for awhile and my "old" vet didn't seem to get it.... my groomer recommended a vet in Fort McLeod so out we went today.... one urine test - yes, you should have seen me walking her and coaxing her to pee! Anyways, she has to be given a medication morning and night and it took half hour to get it down her throat tonight.... it's pill form.... so must phone vet tomorrow to see if an easier way...she has no "favourite" foods that I could bribe her with... she's high maintenance no matter how you look at it!

Other than that I've been doing very little... I'm okay with that but if I don't do my wash soon I shall have to hang out in pj's and that wouldn't be good as they are all saggy and baggy.....

Going to the theatre tomorrow night to see a summer musical revue.... they are such fun!

SEVERAL DAYS LATER....

Seem to have lost my momentum.... overwhelmed by the retirement party the team gave me... beautiful over the top gifts... and more gift cards! So lucky! First time I felt any real emotion after leaving my job... but it was about the individual team members and my connection to so many of them .... I know I'll see some of them ongoingly .... but it's still saying goodbye to many of them as they have very busy lives and they are on the team to contribute to the community....

Weather is so heavy.... feels like there should be a huge storm... lots of lightning and thunder and a bit of rain so it stays heavy and close....

Cleaned up the aftermath of the party today.... just have the booze to sort out and I need a box for that!

Another week and I shall be on my way to Vancouver!

ANOTHER CELEBRATION!

... but the last, I think! My ex-team are coming for a barbeque tomorrow night so cleaning cleaning.... and would you believe, it's a 30% chance of rain... after all this beautiful weather day after day... 40 people inside the house... yikes!

I feel so lazy all the time.... it's the "i don't have any deadline" thing I do believe... strange but lovely in its very own way!

Officially retired now.... am a "fixed income" person... not sure how I feel about that but not up for looking for anything but doing nuttin'..... surprises me but am happy about it at the same time...

Obviously don't have much to say tonight so I'll sign off and tell you all about the barbeque tomorrow night!

Happy Canada Day!

Tomorrow is the big day for Canada! Will celebrate at home quietly... do some stuff for the big barbeque Friday night... I think there will be about 40 of the team here! Must call Sobey's tomorrow and order the roast for the beef dip!

Had a pedicure today and planted a few perennials but that's it.... very lazy again and that's okay..... still feel tired especially with the crick in my back... it hurts so have been using heat/ice and stretching....

Going to bed early and hopefully to sleep.... not going off very early this week and that could be why I feel tired!

Ain't life good!

The weather is so fantastic it's breathtaking.... all in the low to mid 20's.... it's like a Vancouver spring... which we have never had in Lethbridge since I moved here.....makes such a difference to spirit and energy!

Had my car detailed today and it looks brand new... wanted to have a sweet smelling, clean looking car to travel in....

Tired.... going to bed early.... tons of errands tomorrow but the reward is my favourite thing.... a pedicure!

Weekends?

Have to keep saying that the weather is phenomenal! Perfect for me in the low 20's!

Wonderful dinner party last night.... such good food and good company and good jokes and good conversation! Sat out later under the starts drinking Bailey's ... took it easy as I did have to drive home.... lovely of Sharon and Gary to celebrate my retirement in this way.... really nice nice nice!

Tired today and no reason for it.... lots of things to do if I wish but I'm not wishing to do anything! So it's a lazy weekend... although every day is a weekend day now isn't it....

Taking car in for it's annual interior shampoo... want it to smell good and feel good for my trip to Vancouver.

Talk later....

A Hurdle rather than a Step!

Today wasn't my best day... emotionally... in fact it's 2:00 a.m. and I am still kavetching about how I'm feeling... trying to talk myself out of it.... berating myself.... saying it's time to suck it up! But it's not working so I thought I'd get up and dump it here... hopefullly!

The day started well.... massage and lunch with Joanne... then I went to Wehlage's retirement barbeque because I care about him and wanted to wish him well.... I knew it wasn't going to be good for me though. And it wasn't. I tried not to feel hurt but I did... do.... Mostly because of the magnitude of the event and McKenzie's speech regarding Wehlage's contribution to the community etc... which is all very very true... the hurt comes from the fact that McKenzie didn't say hi, goodbye or kiss my ass to me.... absolutely nothing about the last ten years... nada...zero..zilch! And, yes, I hate to admit it hurts but it just does. I wasn't expecting him to say anything tonight, of course.... tonight was Wehlage's... but to not say anything to me... even privately... totally sucks... why do I care about what he thinks when he so obviously doesn't... and what does that say about him?! See what I mean... intellectually I know the answers... emotionally I'm still just plain hurt! Being human sucks!

Really? Again?

Today was a lovely day.... as are most! Awake too damn early but the tree guy came and sprayed the elms as they are diseased this year.... so then I had to wash the deck down so the dogs didn't get sick..... planted a few more geraniums... don't know why I love this flower.... it just seems courageously strong and bright and doesn't give up easily!

The "retirement" function at the Police Station was good... Jan picked me up so I had company which definitely made it easier. I received a plaque from the RCMP which blew me away - after everything I said to them about their lack of service to victims! Oh, well, easy to be nice when the person is walking out the door. Also received cards from the Crown Prosecutors' Office with several gift cards enclosed and from the Domestic Violence Action Team... gift cards there too! As well the Management of the Service gave me a card with a ton of gift cards inside! All for food and books... my two favourite things! One for a garden centre as well and I will buy a beautiful bush for the front of the house. And one for Pier One so I shall have to buy something that commemorates my years here.

Jan, Maynard, Julie and Ian and I went for a drink and nibbles at the Mocha and were joined by Don and Barb Lamont later.... Chadsey also turned up.... he's one weird guy.... never know where he's at which I think is what he strives for! Such a waste of time.

Home... wash... cooked chicken for dogs and now I am going to bed to read!

Am I going to do this every day?

Really.... do people do this everyday? Does that mean that eventually you tell the truth about what's going on in one's life? And who do they give their blog info to? And do people really read it?

Another beautiful day in Lethbridge.... really! We usually move from one only spring day right into hotter than hades summer.... but we are having the most incredible spring/early summer temperatures.... I love it!

That's enough of this....

Another Day in Paradise!

Woke up soooo early today... made myself go back to sleep.... I've heard from others that as you age, you wake early! I had so hoped this wouldn't be me! Maybe it means naps??? It was such a stunningly beautiful day.... the epitome of my dream day...about 22 degrees, light breeze and the sun shining!

Travelled to Calgary today to have my passport renewed.... thought it would take most of the day and it took only TEN MINUTES! I can still hardly believe it... walked in.... walked out.... sometimes you just have to love the government!

Ruby's 10th birthday today... sent her a game for her Nintendo DS so hope she got it... tried to phone but of course she's in school... sang onto the message machine so I'm sure she'll be giggling at Grannie's oh so terrible singing voice..

Did some shopping in Calgary - everything is on sale right now and with the Australia trip being "spring/summer" I picked up a few shirts and a pair of jeans just for that trip! Thinking about putting all my "work clothes" in a storage tub and hiding in some dark crevice!

Tomorrow is lunch with all the Inspectors and the Chief - maybe they won't show! I know... I have a bad attitude... it's just that I feel that it's over and what the hell will we talk about anyways!

June 22nd!

It's raining in Lethbridge! And this is the first Monday that I realized I don't have to "get moving" for work.... a bit shocking really! The rain helped though as
it was much easier to snuggle down under the covers and snooze a bit more. Effe was right there with me .... who knows where our "loner" Tess is.

Cleaning out drawers, piles of paper I've been meaning to read through just in case there was something important.... not! Feels good though to have the time and the energy to do something. Can feel that all the drugs are out of my body ... feel like
me again. Hopefully the hip pain will stay away for a while longer!

Planning my roadtrip to Vancouver... excited to see all the women who have been such good friends over the past 50 years... and to get away!

Had a dream last night that I started my own business.... that was very scarey!

The First Week

Yes, the first week of my retirement has passed! Officially I'm not done until June 30th but it already feels like it's done.... surprisingly!

On the other hand, I have been incredibly ill.... surgeon gave me Celebrex to get rid
of the inflammation that was causing so much trouble... and I turn out to be the
3-1/2% that cannot take it - had a huge huge allergic reaction to it.... my ability to breathe decreased day by day and it got very scarey.... suspected heart attack but EKG showed that was okay... so they put me on megadose of prednisone and two days
in I was starting to feel better.... four days in and I am doing really well... breathing about 80% but give it another week.... I'm finished with the prednisone though.... miracle it may be but I do believe it's a tad overkill/dangerous!

So with my recent return to better health, I can feel energy surging into my body again.... thank god! So cleaning out car, my junk drawers, etc.... so at least I have started!

Next week is very busy.... some retirement events and a quick trip to Calgary to renew my passport.... booked Australia for October and November and then discovered I would have less than 6 months on it.... and to get my entry visa must get it done....

Planning my trip to Vancouver in July and, of course, my trip to the Shuswap for our Stuart Family Reunion..... will tell you about those as they happen!

The next next step....

Long time since I even looked at my blog! Too busy still working and deciding about "retirement"... another word I don't seem to care for! Sounds too much like life is "over".....! But here I am having made the decision and with only four working days left do not regret my decision!

Do I have fears? You betcha! What are they? Well, everyone tells me I am going to be bored bored bored! And I am fearful they are right.... so I have chosen to stay
focussed on what is next for the rest of 2009 and not get too involved with what's after that. I have been able to create my life to date so why would it stop now?

I am going on two short road trips - one of them being a famiy reunion - we used to have these every second year but now it's been at least 10 years - so all my cousins are excited and we have two surviving "stuart" uncles who will be attending as well... I am also trying to decided when I want to go to Australia - Lucas is 13 this October so that's a must.... will I stay for Xmas or come home? That's the question and don't know why it's so hard to make!

As well, I have ahead of my a hip replacement.... finally got to the surgeon and my status moved from "moderate" to "severe" so that's it.... he has a waitlist of 10-12 months so has perscribed Celebrex to help me manage my physical life.... have taken for 3 days now and it's already working and I am extremely hopeful it's a drug I can take with few side effects and certainly not life threatening ones!

Anyways, that's me ..... I am going to try to use this site as I enter "retirement" so that I can not only get support from you my friends but also to have something to look back on over the years!